Abusive Relationship Signs.

An abusive relationship can start when you’re dating, and if you’re codependent, you set weak boundaries so you’re much more easily conned.

Learn the signs before you’re charmed by the personality and then get into an abusive relationship.

These warning signs should send out a ‘flag’, to tell you to focus on the behavior that demonstrates their control, restriction and disrespect for you. Everyone should be entitled to make their own choices, and not fear their partner.

Also be aware that abusers are great con artists. They can be very charming and convincing with everyone (even their partners) until you get ‘hooked’. They may even continue to be ‘really nice guys’ to everyone – accept you.

This is very effective, because the woman thinks “maybe it’s my fault”, particularly when he says it is in the first place. It also makes it more difficult to complain about him because they couldn’t imagine it.

The #1 Warning Sign

• If he was in a previously violent relationship, abusive men rarely change.

Don’t think that it will be different with you or that she didn’t treat him ‘right’. Almost without exception, every abuser claims that he was a victim in the former relationship, so don’t feel sorry for him. Keep an open mind.

Additional Warning Signs:

• He diminishes your friends or makes it difficult for you to see them.

• He loses his temper over smallest things.

• He has rigid ideas about the roles of men and women and can’t/won’t discuss it reasonably.

• You find yourself trying to assess his mood and only think of his needs. A healthy relationship is give and take.

• It’s hard to get emotional or physical distance, and when/if you do, you get cross-examined afterwards.

• He criticizes you all the time – your weight, your hair, your clothes etc.

• All relationship decisions are made by him and your needs are ignored or dismissed as unimportant.

Keep watch for these behaviors even when you’re dating. It doesn’t change when you move in together or even get married. It only gets worse and it becomes harder to leave.

If you think that you or someone you know is involved with an abuser, there is additional helpful information on this site to help you think out your options. Everyone deserves a healthy relationship. You deserve it too.

Are you in an abusive relationship?

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